As a feminist, I have learned that social justice issues are
so intricately connected to one another. The intersectionality of any
oppression or justice is inherent in our daily lives. This is what I remembered last Thursday
evening when I attended the Interdependence Project which talked about meditation and the four
Immearsureables. From this workshop, I
remembered to sense more connections within myself as well as with others and to dissolve the uncessary walls built in between.
My evening started when, I met up with my good friend, Brian
Gorman, to catch up, grab a bite to eat, and attend that workshop. Brian and I have been friends for a few years
and have an intimate relationship where we share deeply about each other’s
lives. Our dinner at Wild Ginger was no
different. There, over kale salad, sautéed
mushrooms over spinach and lemon water, we caught each other up on our most
recent journeys including our sons, work, dates, and joys.
The rain poured heavily down on the lower east side as we
left the restaurant and headed to the meditation workshop. Unfortunately, I did not bring an
umbrella. However this gave me an excuse
to cuddle up with my dear friend while walking the few blocks north to Houston
Street.
At the workshop, I sat and listened to many ideas
on how to cultivate more compassion and happiness, and reduce suffering. I was inspired by the facilitators and took
notes.
I typed them up today to remember and integrate them more
deeply into my living practice. I share
them here with hopes you may gain something from it as well. Please enjoy!
Notes:
Acquire and read two books – Radical Acceptance, Tara Brach
and Living Kindness, Sharon Salzberg
The Four Immeasurables,
also known as the four abodes – Homes, are:
·
These are actions not just a feeling.
·
These are meant to be natural, not forced. Practiced so that they become a natural part
of our interaction within us and with others.
·
Practiced, well they will dissolve boundaries and
bring us closer to others.
1. Loving Kindness
a.
The desire for everyone, without exception, to
be happy.
b.
Offer indiscriminately, like the rain. The rain falls on everything and anything
without discrimination. Practice loving
kindness on all like the rain.
2. Compassion
a.
A wish for beings to be free from suffering.
b.
Sometimes being compassionate is about creating
boundaries or holding up boundaries.
c.
Scorpian and the man who kept getting stung
d.
Garth Brooks – the change – the world will know
that it cannot change me.
e.
Sharon Salzberg says that compassion is when our
heart trembles with the pain that others feel.
f.
Practice: I care about this suffering. May I be free from suffering.
g.
First noble truth – Stress and Suffering exists.
i.
We are culturally trained to turn away from
suffering
ii.
The Pleasure principle
iii.
However to truly end suffering, we should turn
into or open up to suffering.
h.
Compassion is the natural response to the
awakened heart.
i.
Make time for compassion.
j.
Many times we forget that people who differ from
us suffer. These people usually fall
into two categories. People with whom we
disagree or have some conflict with and people with whom we admire or are
inspired by. However, they too have
suffered as much or more regardless of their money, attitude, apartment/home,
and privilege.
k.
The far enemy of compassion is cruelty
l.
The near enemy of compassion include
i.
Pity – aww – power
ii.
Despair – hopless
iii.
Grief – heavy
iv.
Justified anger – fuel, social justice, solidification
of us and them
v.
Overwhelm
m.
The practice and process of compassion dissolves
anger.
n.
You may not choose your family, but do you
choose your role in your family?
o.
Be compassionate to ourselves first!
i.
Forgive ourselves so that we can forgive others
who are hurtful.
ii.
If can’t touch our own pain, we can’t help
others.
p.
Wisdom and compassion are like the two wings of
a bird. One needs both in order to fly gracefully.
q.
Cultivating Compassion:
i.
Be open to suffering and our own pain
ii.
Everyone is a teacher, especially people with
whom we have difficulty with.
1.
Remember how I was once like that.
2.
May I remember to be more ___ not like that.
iii.
Deep Listening
1.
Not just a feeling, but an action we can do.
2.
Listen clearly
3.
An act of love and caring
iv.
Remember they also experience suffering
1.
Visualize others when they are born and just
before they die – Great equalizer.
v.
Tongala – Tibetan
1.
Send and Receive Meditation
2.
Breath in someone’s pain and transform it and
then send back love or healing.
r.
What is Anger?
i.
It is a hard shield
ii.
It is a second emotion, meaning that underneath the
anger, there is another emotion being masked. – What lays beneath is usually
more sensitive
iii.
It is like throwing hot coals at someone. First you burn yourself!
iv.
Drop the story
v.
Feel the anger
vi.
Don’t relate from it, relate to it.
3. Sympathetic Joy
a.
The ability to have a genuine sense of
appreciation for someone else’s happiness or good fortune
b.
Not to have envy
4. Equanimity
a.
The ability to recognize and experience all
things and all beings are equal.
b.
This includes people, animals and feelings
May I serve as an impetus for positive change.
